Tuesday, June 14, 2011


We talked about doing a video for the architecture program. It never happened, but here's the general script of it. Cheesy but true:

10 Ways to Become a Famous Architect
1. Do Everything Completely Different from Everyone Else. (a.k.a. Find new, innovative ways to do things.)

A person pours a cup of coffee normally from a French press. The “architect” turns it upside down and pours it in a ridiculously exaggerated manner.

2. When using a drafting board, make all of your lines appear hand-drawn.
The “architect” starts drafting a straight line and then makes it all bumpy looking. The next scene shows them giving a presentation and one of the professors saying, “Wow, so all these lines are handdrafted! They are so straight! Amazing!” The “architect” just smirks silently.

3. Emulate your idols.
The “architect” is running down a quiet hall with a white sheet pinned to their back yelling, “LOOK! I’m Frank Lloyd Wright!” Everyone that is working on projects briefly stares and then refers back to their work.

4. In fact, emulate all of your idols at once, to stay cutting edge.
The “architect” stands with Le Corbusier’s coke bottle glasses, FLW’s cape, and a pile of Louis Kahn-style scraps of paper.

5. Use some of the most random objects to create your models and therefore appear ahead of your time.
The “architect” presents a study model made of 2 washers, a piece of a pipe, some lint from the dryer, and a banana with squares carved in it. Everyone around them is clearly floored. Professor 1: (whispers) That is the most amazing design I think I have ever seen. Professor 2: “You’re kidding me, right?”

6. When all else fails, break the mold and stand out.
A bunch of people are standing in a room wearing all black and talking. It looks like a formal gathering after a review. The “architect” walks in with very bright attire.
A few people stare at them and move away to reveal a casket. It’s a funeral.

7. Sign all of your work incomprehensibly.
The “architect” quickly scrawls a “signature” across half of a drawing.

8. When presenting your work, make sure to use the largest words you possibly can, and go off on unrelated tangents that casually refer back to your thesis.
The “Architect” is talking and the professor interrupts and says, “Wait…wait..wait. What does a dog in a birthday hat riding in the sidecar of a motorcycle have to do with your building?”

9. Develop really weird eccentricities to convince everyone that you are a genius.
The “architect” walks by and waves to some classmates, wearing a headband made out of a gym sock.
Person 1: “Why does he have a gym sock taped to his head?”
Person 2: “Because he’s a genius. That’s why.”

10. And lastly, ake sure to name-drop as much as possible to show that you have Architecture in your blood.
At a bar, the “Architect” is overheard telling someone of the opposite sex, “You know, my grandfather’s grandfather’s father was also an architect..."

Video would have ended with the "Architect" running around in the cape yelling.

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